May 18, 2014

Are Imaginary Lines Keeping You From Success?

As I drive the roads of Dallas/Fort Worth, I see a consistently amazing sight. The roads here are undergoing massive construction and there are many areas where the roads twist and change. In one area as you drive West on Highway 114 toward the Trophy Club, the road narrows from three lanes to two. As expected, before you get to where the road narrows, there are signs indicating this will happen in so many feet. As you approach the actual point of where it narrows, there are yellow lines that show you to make the move over from the far left lane to the lane that was just to your right. Now, imagine this: the road doesn’t actually end where the yellow line is. It extends much further. In spite of that, I quite frequently see people come close to causing accidents on this area of the road. They attempt to get ahead of the cars driving in the lane to their right and wait until right where the yellow line blends the lanes to make the switch over into the next lane . It’s not amazing that people in Dallas drive like this. If you live here, you know that’s a given. What amazes me is the power of the yellow line drawn on the surface of the road. It’s as if that yellow line is a 5-foot-tall cement wall that, if they were to cross it, would cause terrible damage to them and their vehicle. In reality, they could drive much farther before the road runs out and reach their destination much safer for doing so.

As you consider this scenario, let me ask you; What’s your “Yellow Line”? What “lines” have you you drawn on your road-of-life that keep you restricted? What limiting beliefs, hurts, habits, and hang-ups have you drawn in your mind that, if they were extended or expanded, would literally change your life for the better? Fully consider it. When you participate in a sport and you rise to a level that you’ve never participated at before, does a “line” appear telling you that you aren’t supposed to be at that level? Possibly, it’s in your career. Is there an imaginary “line” of income or position that, if you were to cross it, you would feel the need to get back on the other side of your “Yellow Line” again? This is your self-ego “Yellow Line”. Self-ego is what tells you, “Look, you’re only this good. If you do better than ___, then you aren’t deserving of it. It’s more than who you believe you are or can be”. Some people associate self-sabotage with these events. You’ve crossed you “Yellow Line” and now you have to pay by losing as much ground as you had gained. It’s like the people I described above driving on Highway 114. They either get right up to the yellow line and jerk their car back over into the next lane and come close to causing an accident. Any real forward progress is lost. Many times, had they continued safely on just another 20-30 feet, they would have been in front of the pack of cars and made real progress. But, their fear of crossing an imaginary boundary wins out.

Imaginary boundaries are usually created in our unconscious mind through repetition or traumatic events. These boundaries become our beliefs. Our beliefs about ourselves, our relationships, our income, our weight, everything we are in life. The good news is that those beliefs can all be changed. Many people take the long road to making those changes. They go through self-development programs, 4-6 weekends of group therapy, see psychologists, counselors and therapists, etc. People that want to take the most effective shortcut to make those changes come to see me.

Creating life in forward motion,
Dr. Edward Lewellen